Twilight: Jasper's Story
by XxXStealeRXxX
Summary: This is Twilight from Jasper's Point of View. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

I glanced slyly at Alice. She didn't notice, probably to busy "watching" me. Her eyes were _physically_ pointed out the window, but the blank look in them spoke volumes. Aside from that, I could feel her genuine concern. It was annoying being watched all the time, and for a split second I considered replacing her concern, then thought better of it. She should be concerned about my immediate future. I was concerned about it.

I was thirsty. Very thirsty. Sitting in a lunchroom, that was currently filled with weak, defenseless, warm bodied children… My throat burned. They could fix that. This is a lunchroom after all… No. No. I mustn't think that way.

My eyes flicked to Edward. He caught that last train of thought. His whole body was tensed as he stared at me, but something about the thought amused him, I could feel that, see it in his twitching lip… But he was worried too. He should worry.

I gazed out the window like Alice

In my opinion, this whole charade was stupid. Dangerous. The whole point of the "vegetarian" lifestyle was to preserve human life. Sitting in classrooms with them everyday was like dropping a mouse in to the cage of a hungry cobra. We are the predators. They are the prey. We are hungry… it's a simple matter of mathematics really, one plus one equals two, thirsty predator plus juicy prey equals dinner…

"Jasper," Edward whispered.

Emmett looked at me out of the corner of his eye. He was curious. What had Edward heard to make him break his silence? He was also cautious. Maybe he didn't want to intrude on my thoughts. That was unusual for him. He never worried about anything least of all offending someone. This life was a game for him. Emmett must already have an idea of what my issue is… He must not want to push it. That was… nice of him. If that was the reason behind his caution.

Rosalie didn't care. She barely acknowledged the fact that Edward had spoken at all. Self-satisfaction. I could guess the reasons for that; she was pretty and she knew it. A sharp burst of desire as her eyes lingered on Emmett's form. Great, just what I need. Another horny teenager. Get a grip Rose.

Hormones have these kids' emotions running rampant. I could feel insecure, neurotic, jealous, unhappy, lovesick, heartbroken, excited, conceited, amused, lust, angry, misunderstood…You get the picture.

There was also curiosity. Yes, everyone was curious today. There was a new girl that had everyone excited, curious. Chief Swan's girl. Barbara? Becky? Bella, that was it. Who cares, really, what's another set of hormones?

Irritation. Alice's irritation. I didn't like her to be irritated, or have any form of negative emotion really. It wasn't like her. Alice usually conducts her life in a sphere of effervescence. Moreover, I want her to be happy. I love her to much to tolerate anything that causes her to be anything but happy. She should always be happy. She deserves happiness.

_Happy,_ I thought concentrating on Alice. I watched as a soft smile drifted over her face, then her eyes snapped into focus. She looked it me. I could see the accusation in her eyes, but she was amused too. She grinned. I would do anything for that grin. I'd go to high school, pretend to be just another hormonal teenager, tolerate the raging inferno growing in my throat everyday for the rest of eternity for that grin.

Okay, maybe I'm whining too much. This climate is definitely an improvement over the last… Fighting for my life while others fought me for theirs. Hate and fear. The shock of terror mingling with hopelessness as my opponents realized they didn't stand a chance against my skill. The shallow thrill of victory as I, and my surviving comrades, surveyed the broken bodies on the battlefield. The pleading, begging, desperation of the spoils of war: Human Un-Happy Meals.

Alice stood and exited the room. She must have decided I'm not going to kill anyone today. What a relief… for _them_ anyway. I still have to suffer.

Edward was mildly surprised and then bored. The boredom was nothing new. Pretending to be human held no more interest for him than it did for me. I glanced at Edward again, but he was staring at the new girl. He looked away quickly. I caught her embarrassment. Evidently she hadn't meant for him to catch her staring. Funny how they stared at us. We were beautiful to them. Even me.

I bet Bella wouldn't stare so boldly, if she could see a little clearer. If she could see the scars on my face, my neck, I bet she wouldn't find me beautiful anymore. She'd be the first student here to understand how much danger she and her classmates were in.

Realization mixed with surprise, and… curiosity? Edward's boredom was gone. His expression changed as if something occurred to him that had not before. He turned to look at the new girl again. Edward found the new girl interesting? What had she thought? His realization moved to make room for frustration. She was frustrating him? What had she thought?

In spite of myself I listened in on her conversation, a little curious too.

Jessica Stanley was talking about Edward. Mentioning how he doesn't date. Explaining how Bella shouldn't put efforts in to pursuing him. The Stanley girl was annoyed. The Swan girl didn't feel infatuated though. Just curious.

Edward looked away again. He was uneasy. The new girl had made him uneasy? What? Was she a serial killer, planning on taking out her peers, and had her plans injured his morals? He glared at me now as he listened to my thoughts heavily tainted with sarcasm.

"Shut up," he muttered.

I needed fresh air, before I settled into a cramped classroom. I needed to clear my head. I needed to clear my heart too. Sometimes its hard to feel my own emotions surrounded by those of so many others. I rose to leave, my siblings did too. They must want to watch me. Yeah, that's just what I need four babysitters.

The atmosphere at home with my family is easier. Edward feels mostly content, though a twinge of annoyance every now and then. Not that I blame him for the annoyance. It must be annoying, to be the only single in a house full of couples. Maybe he should date. Not Jessica, clearly, but Tanya was sweet on him… Emmett's often amused at something or other, not easily worried. It was easy to be with him. Rosalie, conceited maybe, but at least she knows who she is. Her future is secure. Carlisle, always patient and kind, his future was never in question despite what he thinks. Esme. She was delightful to be around. Compassionate and loving… I was barely in her life for five minutes and she was ready to call me her son.

Alice. Beautiful Alice. Loving Alice. Happy Alice. My Alice. She found me. She saved me. I will never let myself lose her. I will never let her be hurt. Alice. My light, my love, my Alice.

We met up at the car after school, all except one. Edward wasn't there. Odd. He always beat us to the car.

"Where is he?" Rosalie complained.

The doors were locked and Edward had the keys. She wasn't really annoyed with being forced to stand while we waited. No doubt she was enjoying the extra stares we were receiving as others climbed into their car. The annoyance probably came from the principle of the thing. Her having to wait for him. Rosalie waits for nobody. Except maybe Emmett.

"What's he doing?" Rosalie whined again looking at Alice.

Alice's eyes glazed over as she spoke, "He's… changing classes?" She sounded unsure.

"Are you asking or telling," Emmett said with a chuckle.

"Telling. He's trying to get out of biology. Ms. Cope's going to tell him no."

"Why is he doing that?" I asked.

Alice shrugged but I could feel her confusion.

The Volvo beeped and flashed its lights. Rosalie and Emmett climbed in immediately. Not me. Not Alice.

I was frozen by Edward's feelings. Panic. Fear. Anger. Thirst. Intense thirst. Alice didn't need to feel him. His emotions were clear enough in his wild eyes. She was frozen as her mind searched for what had upset him.

"Your running away?" Alice gasped.

Edward's anger spiked at the phrase "running away". I shifted my weight to put myself between him and her but he was already darting around to his door. As Alice and I climbed into the car I noticed Rosalie and Emmett had finally noticed Edward's extreme behavior. They had seen him move around the car… too fast. We weren't supposed to move like that in front of humans. Edward made a mistake moving like that… He never makes mistakes. Edward made a mistake. Something was very wrong.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Edward was gone and Alice couldn't see him coming back. It left the rest of us on edge. I remember that night when Carlisle had explained to us what happened…

We were convened in the dining room, all but two. Edward and Carlisle were still missing and Alice was certain Edward was not returning anytime soon. He was heading up to the Denali coven. It was a little ironic considering my thoughts after lunch, but I couldn't enjoy the irony. Mainly because this separation was painful to Alice. I hated anything that upset Alice. She and Edward were very close and his unexpected exodus frightened her… Mainly because it was so unexpected. Also because he hadn't told her _why._

Carlisle would have been home by now except an emergency had arrived at the hospital. Alice had seen that Edward would go to Carlisle before leaving town. Carlisle would know what was wrong. He would explain.

I was controlling the situation as best I could. Everybody _had_ been anxious. Now they were calm. Except for me. I had originally assumed my anxiety was a byproduct of theirs. After all, Edward was an adult (sort of) and he was more than capable of looking after himself, so there was no need to be concerned, right? But even as I washed away their fears, mine remained.

Edward had left and he didn't tell us why it was necessary or where he was going. But I remembered the emotions emitting from Edward, the urgency and the panic, and I knew the departure _was_ necessary. I asked Alice if she could find the catalyst, if she could see what would make Edward so willingly abandon us. She tried, but she didn't understand what she saw any better. What she saw was Bella Swan's confused face.

I decided not to mention the incident at lunch. Not yet. They were worried enough. Besides I wasn't sure that that moment could qualify as an incident. The strange exchange of emotions between Edward an Bella may have been irrelevant to the present situation. It was better to wait for Carlisle.

Then we could hear it. The sound of the Volvo's engine slowing on the freeway, the tires hitting the drive; the speed was unusually fast even for Carlisle. Not bothering to go to the garage, he stopped just out front. He must have known we'd be waiting.

The second Carlisle entered Esme flitted to his side. She put a hand on his arm and looked into his face. I released my hold on my family's emotions and concentrated on his. Worry. Patience. Sadness. A touch of pride.

"Well? What happened?" Rosalie asked impatiently.

Carlisle let out a sigh before answering. "Edward had a class with Bella Swan today. He said that she smells better than any he has ever met. Her blood calls to him. He left to prevent himself from taking her life."

There was silence for a second as understanding sank in.

"He didn't have to go. He could have stayed. He could have quit school and-" Esme began - she didn't like Edward's leaving anymore than Alice - but Carlisle didn't let her finish.

"Esme, if he stayed, he might have decided to go looking for her… Leaving was the best choice for him," he said softly, putting a comforting hand on her cheek as he spoke. "He made the right decision."

* * *

Irina had called us this morning to let us know he had checked in. Edward was pretty shaken up and he wouldn't tell them what was wrong. All that he had said was that he needed to go hunting immediately. He left the car in their drive and took off running. Tanya had caught up with him and told him to call home, but he didn't want to call home. Tanya wanted to respect his wishes, but Irina decided that no matter his problem, Edward was being childish. She did not feel so inclined to respect his wishes.

We appreciated the call. I doubted Edward would when he found out.

I felt unbelievably guilty. Everyone was worried about Edward, but now that I understood the reason for his absence I couldn't help being a little… smug. So Edward had a weakness after all, did he? Maybe now _he_ won't be so smug next time I leave class early to "see the nurse" because I can't ignore my desire to sink my teeth into the teacher's throat…

School wasn't so bad for me anymore. That first week was brutal. But things were easier now thanks to Carlisle's brilliant planning. To ensure that I would never be alone with the _normal_ children, to ensure that the risk of me slaughtering an entire classroom was small as possible, Carlisle ensured that Rosalie would be with me at all times. The story in town was that me and Rosalie were twins - humans never looked close enough to see that our only trait in common was the blonde hair - and we were also foster children. Carlisle took the stereotype that all foster children have "problems" and milked it for all it was worth. Carlisle had persuaded the school to change my schedule due to the fact that I had psychological disorder that caused me to have severe separation anxiety whenever I had to be separated from my beloved twin. He had explained that for the sake of my well being it would be safer if she and I could share classes. I nearly choked on my grizzly when he was explaining this one to me.

Of course the school administrators didn't argue with Carlisle, he was a doctor, he knew what he was talking about, right? Of course not one of them had wanted to argue either, who would want to upset the talented, kind, handsome new doctor and his lovely wife? Who would want to risk having Dr. and Mrs. Cullen's mentally deranged foster son having some kind of manic episode and terrorizing their children?

So here I am sitting in Chemistry with Rosalie as my lab partner. Today was a lecture day, not a lab, for which I was grateful. Some of the chemicals used in the labs smell awful. Of course the teacher never called on me, none of them ever called on me, unless I raised my hand which I rarely did. The reason for that was I often gave off a very distinct vibe, one that the humans can never seem to explain, and that vibe was _thirsty._ I could fix the issue, make them feel more comfortable, more inclined to interact with me, but what was the point? I already knew everything they were teaching. I'd taken this class before.

Erin Derby, the worst student in the class, late again, had been walking to the front desk to hand in her homework. She was an idiot. A boy across the room had winked at her and she paused to smile at him. She was also _too_ close. The way her head turned, pulling the skin tight on her neck, revealing the point where her warm blood pulsed so invitingly…

_Urgency,_ I aimed at Rosalie. She sucked in a sharp breath as the emotion hit her without warning. She glanced at me and then at Erin. I turned my attention to the black board and concentrated on counting the scratches.

"Erin?" Rosalie called the name sharply.

I couldn't see the girl's expression but I could feel the intensity of her surprise from being addressed by Rosalie.

"Are you going to stand their all day? You know, some of us actually would like to graduate this year..." Rosalie's tone was not friendly and the girl took the hint almost immediately.

Lunch was easier. We always sat away from the other students. Mainly so no one would notice we weren't eating. Also, who in their right minds would want to sit with us?  
Alice was off in her head again. Looking for Edward. Looking for Bella. Looking for me. It's a wonder her head didn't explode. I couldn't take my eyes off of her, what was she seeing? I knew her well enough not to ask just yet; I could feel her concentration. Luckily Emmett couldn't feel her concentration.

"What's he doing?" Emmett asked.

All three of us looked at Alice now.

"Nothing. He's just sitting in a snow drift a foot away from a half drained bear." Alice shrugged and the frowned.

"And _her_?" Rosalie asked.

"As far as I can tell she doesn't know anything. She's going grocery shopping after school." Alice giggled.

"It's not funny Alice," Rosalie snapped. "What if she noticed something… _off?_ Edward's the only one who can tell us what's going on inside her head and he's on an extended hunting trip…"

"Rose, it's a little more than a hunting trip," Emmett attempted to soothe her. "Besides I doubt the girl knows anything even if she noticed something. Humans aren't exactly as smart as they think they are… What are the odds she'd be the one to figure it out?"

On this point I agreed with Rosalie. Emmett's assessment was flawed; what were the odds that someone who smelled that way to Edward would end up moving to the same town as he did? Slim to none, and yet… We needed to know what she was thinking. We needed Edward. The problem was that we needed Edward to be in the one place he couldn't afford to be.

The week passed slowly. Tanya called on Wednesday night to inform us of a failed attempt to send him home. Carlisle assured her that there was no reason for her to worry, but I could feel his amusement. I ascertained from that that Tanya's luck with Edward on other matters had not improved. It wasn't until Friday night that we all got a little hopeful.

Alice had a sudden stab of excitement and blurted out, "He's coming home!"

The room that had been vacant but for the two of us was suddenly filled.

"When?" I asked.

"Sunday night. He's traveling at human speed, he's not in a hurry." She answered.

"Why?" I asked. Did she see why he would want to risk returning?

"I'm not sure, but he's going back to school."

"Has he lost his mind?" Emmett asked cheerfully.

"Emmett!" Rosalie snapped.

Everyone felt relieved and hopeful. But Rosalie was also stressed about something. Emmett found something amusing. Esme was pleased. Carlisle felt concerned. Alice was excited.

* * *

**How was it? **


	3. Chapter 3

**Hiya, here's chapter 3 into Jasper's mind... Hope you like**

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**Chapter 3**

Of course Alice was right. On Sunday night we heard the Mercedes announcing Edward's return. We were all trying to look like we weren't waiting. I saw no point to the charade. It didn't matter what we looked like because there was no way to hide what we were thinking. He would know we were waiting before he even got off the freeway. Even so, I continued to stare at whatever movie was on screen.

"Edward!" Alice exclaimed as he came through the door. She bounded to his side and threw her arms around him.

"I missed you too," Edward said giving her quick embrace.

"So you've finally decided to grace us with your presence, have you?" Rosalie teased lightly. She was too relieved to have him home to use genuine sarcasm.

"I know Emmett," Edward replied to whatever was in Emmett's head. "I'm sorry for taking off like that…" He was looking at Esme now.

"Welcome back son," Carlisle spoke now. Then he raised an eyebrow as he asked some question he didn't want the rest of us to hear.

Edward nodded his head yes a couple of times. So annoying.

Edward chuckled and looked at me. "Sorry," he said and then grinned.

I separated Edward's emotions from the others, identified them. Some relief. A lot of resolve. Remorse. A little fear. Edward ignored my thoughts this time.

"Edward," Esme hesitated and added unwillingly, "What made you come back?"

"You of course," Edward smiled at her playfully, but he couldn't hide the underlying tension from me. His eyes flicked to my face and back to hers. "I won't be run out of my home by some teenage girl. I _can_ handle this. I'll go hunting tonight, I know what to expect now, I won't be caught off guard again."

"Edward, what was her reaction to you?" Rosalie asked.

There was a moment of silence and then he said quietly, "I don't know."

"Edward, this is important, did she suspect something or not?" I pushed.

"I know its important, but I can't tell you what I don't know." He hesitated then added, "I can't _hear_ her."

The significance of that statement sunk in. The silence was longer this time and filled with tension.

"Whoa." Emmett mouthed.

"Edward…" Esme was too shocked to finish a sentence.

"Well, what does that mean?" Rosalie asked sharply. This revelation made her angry although I couldn't imagine why.

"Rosalie." Carlisle warned. He was intrigued.

"Has this ever happened before?" I asked Edward. It seemed to me like it was the most important question presented to us.

"No, this is a first." His tone was icy. He was frustrated. Was this what had frustrated him at lunch?

"What does that mean?" Emmett asked.

Edward shrugged.

Carlisle answered, "I don't know that it means anything. Everything has a weakness and everybody is a little different. Maybe what makes this girl different from others of her kind is that she exploits your ability's weakness."

Edward ground his teeth and spoke through them, "As if her smell didn't differentiate her enough…"

"Which brings another question to mind. Alice? Can he handle school tomorrow?" I asked.

We all looked at Alice but her eyes were already searching the future.

"It's indistinct, undecided... He'll either kill her or he won't…" She answered, but she wasn't finished searching, we could see that. Then she gasped and her eyes snapped into focus.

I could feel what the others could not. Surprise, joy, and fear. As she stared fixedly at the wall, I could also feel determination.

"Alice, what is it?" Esme asked.

"Alice, what was that?" Edward asked.

They were both tense but curious.

"Nothing," She answered them tonelessly. Yes, she was very determined.

"Alice, what did I do?" Edward begged with a hint of panic.

"Nothing," She repeated. A new emotion now: deceptive. Alice felt deceptive? She was lying?

"What are you lying about? Alice, let me see!" Edward snarled at her, angry now.

_Calm,_ Edward.

"Alice," He said quietly, unable to find his anger again with me in the room.

"Let it go," She whispered.

"Make her tell Jasper," Edward commanded.

I _could_ make Alice tell. Compliance was a very useful emotion. But… Alice must have a good reason for keeping her vision to herself. Should I make her tell? And… forcing her to comply would hurt her. No. I wouldn't ever hurt her, she was my Alice.

Edward heard the answer in my head and I could feel him futilely searching for his anger. I wouldn't let him find it. _Calm,_ Edward.

Alice continued to stare at the wall, concentrating on only Edward knows what, as hard as she could to keep him from the truth.

"Edward, it's late. Take your hunting trip," Carlisle interceded.

He hissed but complied.

I opened my mouth to ask the obvious question but Alice raised her hand and said, "Not till he's out of range."

So we waited.

After a few minutes she breathed a sigh of relief and looked at me with a grin. Victorious.

"Well, what was it?" I asked.

"I can't tell you, he might hear it in your head." She grinned. "Jazz… It's _good_ news."

"You couldn't let Edward hear good news?" Carlisle was confused. He couldn't find sense in that. Neither could I.

"No, he has to learn it for himself. Don't worry, I'll tell you once he does… Although its possible he could beat me to the punch…" Her grin was impossibly big now.

"Surprise, joy, fear… Why?" I asked.

She thought for a moment and then said, "Surprised by what I saw, joy because I liked what I saw, and fear that he would see it before I could hide it. It would make him leave again. He has to learn it for himself."

Lunch again. It was more stressful than usual. Edward was as usual using his ability to keep an eye on me, but there was a change. I was watching him too. He was suddenly feeling aware. He was feeling very aware. No need to ask why.

We both heard Mike Newton announcing a little too loudly, " What's with Bella?"

He must be remembering her smell, that was my explanation for why his thirst flared, tearing through the awareness. His teeth ground together as he crushed the thirst with his fear. I did nothing yet. He needed to feel this. He needed to realize how stupid his plan was. He needed to realize the danger he was putting her, himself, and us in. He didn't have to do this and he shouldn't.

I was also aware. I was aware of Alice silently watching the both of us with her ability. I was aware of all the plump, vital, thumping hearts, accelerated with the excitement and exertion brought on by snow. I was aware of the wave of disappointment that would roll through the students when they realized the rain was washing away the precious white. I was aware I should have gone hunting with Edward last night instead of pestering Alice with fruitless questions.

Mischief from Emmett. I looked just he lurched forward with cunning smile on his face. Alice looked up in surprise - she must have been concentrating very hard on our current problems - and flinched back with a laugh. Rosalie grimaced and the look on her face was enough to make me laugh too. Emmett was shaking his wet curls, flicking melting snow on the two of them. With a sharp jerk of his head he sent the remaining moisture toward Edward, who chuckled in response. Even as I laughed I understood what Emmett was doing just as well as Edward did. Emmett was easing the tension because I refused to.

"Bella, what are you staring at?" Jessica Stanley's insolent tone reached our ears.

Edward's curiosity spiked and he looked over at Bella. The rest of us forced ourselves to not look. I was pretty sure if someone had taken a picture of us at this exact moment we all would have had the same frozen smile pasted our frozen faces. Except for Edward. He was still staring.

"Edward Cullen is staring at you." Jessica spoke through giggles.

Great. The vapid brat had to pick today to be aware as well.

Edward's curiosity caught my attention. As he stared it increased. As it increased it transformed. Curiosity to… fascination? Edward was fascinated? By a human? I glanced at Alice. She looked pleased and she looked like she was trying very hard not to think something.

"Edward! Stop!" Rosalie hissed.

Edward returned his gaze to his lunch tray. He felt confused, amused, and… fascinated?

* * *

**Hmmm... Edward is _fascinated_?... **

**Show me some love...**

** :) ;) :{) etc... :( :/ :\ :| etc...**


	4. Chapter 4

** Hope you like**

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_**Chapter 4**_

It was nine hours ago that we found Edward standing next to the car shaking with mirth. When we asked him what was so funny… he sobered up real quick. Shock flashed through him, washed over his features, and then uncertainty settled in as the dominant emotion. I felt his hesitation as he told us he wasn't sure. Edward climbed in the car then, and without another word, started the engine.

It wasn't as if Edward had never laughed before. He's over a hundred years old. Of course he has laughed. But I still can't get the sound out of my head. It sounded so different from what I was used to hearing… It was… _consuming._ Yes, that was the word I wanted, the sound of his laughter consumed. And the way he felt… The amusement was so _genuine_.

"That's checkmate Jasper. Want to play again?" Alice called my attention back to our game.

I _almost always_ beat Emmett, Esme, Carlisle, and Rosalie at chess. Chess was all about strategy; I was good at strategy. In what felt like another life entirely, my survival once depended on my ability to strategize well. Now strategizing was as natural as a heartbeat on a human. I _always_ lost to Edward and Alice. To much thinking was involved in chess, that's why Edward had the advantage. Alice, well there was no use asking her to shut the visions off and play fairly, because they wouldn't shut off. Not when the visions could only benefit their owner. She didn't look but she could still see.

However, Esme was busy with her blueprints and I could hear Carlisle in his study filling out paperwork. Emmett and Rosalie were… well they were currently pursuing one of their favorite hobbies. I never really understood the concept of playing oneself, so…

"Sure Alice." I answered. That beautiful toothy grin stretched across her face as she eagerly reset the board.

"You're a glutton for punishment aren't you?" Edward spoke from where he sat at his piano.

He had spent over two hours assembling and reassembling notes, becoming more and more displeased with each reassembly. As inspiration continued elude him his frustration grew. Truth be told though, it wasn't just tonight that inspiration eluded him. Edward hadn't composed anything real in awhile now.

"You're one to talk," I replied.

I don't know what made me say that out loud but I knew immediately that I shouldn't have. But I couldn't stop my thoughts from leaping to the Chief's daughter, and how Edward's throat must flame when he sits next to her… I know how bad my thirst feels on a good day, and this girl's smell was more intense than that of a normal human (to Edward at least). Sitting in a warm little room next to _that_ smell, resisting the most basic need… There was no way Edward had an easy time of it today. I could feel the lie in his emotions as he tried to abate Esme and Carlisle's angst this afternoon.

Edward hissed as he heard the avenue my thoughts had taken and the accusation in them. I heard the piano bench tip over as he stood up too quickly. He didn't stop to fix it. He just breezed up to his room and turned on his stereo.

"Was that really necessary?"

I glanced at Alice's frowning face. "Maybe it was," I added honestly.

Alice laughed and stuck her tongue out at Emmett. He had tried to surprise her with a snowball; tried and failed. He chuckled and tried to sidestep her return, but she had foreseen this action too, and a second snowball was on its way before his movement was complete. The first snowball went wide while the second hit him square in the forehead. How very human this behavior would seem, if Alice hadn't moved so fast to get the second ball airborne. She probably foresaw that no one would see her do it.

Rosalie rolled her eyes at the two of them and headed to our first class. I stayed behind to watch Alice enjoy herself, her movement slowing down now. Someone must have spotted us. Edward was behind me, shuffling his feet an inch at a time, like an old man trying not to break a hip on the ice. What an odd thing for him to do. He was moving so slowly and yet he felt so… eager.

"Alright, enough," Emmett laughed. "Rose! Wait up!"

Alice loped back to my side and hooked her arm through mine. I started to move with her, but my feet froze as I caught Edward's emotion. Fascination. His feet froze too. I turned around to look at him and Alice slid gracefully over the slick blacktop as I pulled her with me. Edward was looking across the parking lot toward Bella Swan.

In spite of myself, I looked too. Bella was staring at her truck's back tires. I wondered why, so I extended myself, focusing on her emotions, looking for insight. She was feeling love, loved, and overwhelming gratitude.

And that's when it all went out the window. Tyler Crowley's out of control van caught my peripheral vision, and the sound of squealing tires ripped through the chill morning air. Everybody in the parking lot turned to look then. Including Bella.

Surprise bubbled in her chest first, immediately quashed by terror. The terror she felt was paralyzing her, the poor thing couldn't even blink as she watched the end coming to claim her. Even if she could move, she would only have been able to do so at a human pace, which would not be fast enough to save her life. I felt compassion for this stranger who had caused so much trouble for my family and who would never know a family of her own.

Horror hit every student in the parking lot as they all turned to watch her die. But it was not their horror that caught my attention. It was Edward's horror. It was just so intense. I panicked too, but for a different reason. When her blood spilled… I'd be lucky if I could resist the blood that I thought was average, never mind his resisting with the way it smelled to him…

We could be exposed.

I cut off my breathing and leapt forward to wrap my arms around him, but he was gone. My arms closed around nothingness. Which was strange because the van hadn't hit her yet, her blood hadn't started to run and contaminate the air, so where was he? I saw him, when I got over my shock, running far too fast across he parking lot. His arms wrapped around the girl and he pulled her into the protection of the open space between her truck and another parked car. The van struck then, blocking both from view.

I watched as the velocity of the van affected the point of impact on the antique Chevy's sturdy frame, watched as it curled toward the empty space where I knew Edward hid with Bella. I watched as the van suddenly shuddered to a stop as it encountered something more immovable than the truck. I watched as the one side of the van lifted a foot upwards as if someone very strong had picked it up, than drop to the ground with enough force to leave the windows broken.

I, in contrast to the students around me, didn't know what emotion to display. I couldn't really believe Edward had really done what I was sure I saw him do. My ears were sharp enough to hear over the screams that broke out, even though I couldn't feel passed the fresh hysteria pulsating through the air.

"Bella?" I heard Edward call. "Are you alright?"

He sounded panicked. He should panic. What had he done?

"I'm fine," Bella answered though her small voice was barely audible.

"Be careful, I think you hit your head pretty hard."

That was what he was worried about? Her head? Was he really this stupid?

"Ow," was her only response. Ow? Was she stupid too?

"That's what I thought." He sounded happy now. Was he the Cullen with the psychological disorder then?

"How in the… How did you get over here so fast?" She asked.

If my heart had been beating her question would have stopped it. So maybe she wasn't stupid. A small voice in the back of my head broke through my emotional numbness to scream, _"What did she see, what did she see, what did she see…"_

"I was standing right next to you, Bella," Edward lied.

But did she believe him? Was she suspicious? Was she compliant? Was she too traumatized to care? I struggled to concentrate, to focus. I could feel Alice beside me, appalled but unsurprised. I took note of the lack of surprise. I'd come back to that later. I could feel Emmett and Rosalie, I hadn't noticed they had returned to us. I could feel Emmett's disbelief and nothing else. He was numb, too. Rosalie was outraged. I didn't blame her.

"I saw you," I heard Bella say. What did I miss? What did she see?

"Bella, I was standing with you, and I pulled you out of the way." I could feel him then, the hysteria began to subside as word spread that there were survivors, the atmosphere weakening enough to let me through. Edward felt desperate as he told the lie.

"No." Bella felt stubborn, suspicious, and worst of all, she felt certain.

She knew. She knew. We were exposed. Edward broke the rules and got caught. The rage hit me then. I could taste it on my tongue, it clouded my vision with red, and scrolled shamelessly over my face. The rage shut off all thought process, filling every corner of my spacious mind. It was paralyzing.

Chief Swan showed up after the ambulance and I could feel his panic through my rage as he watched his daughter being placed on a stretcher. As the EMTs lifted her in to the ambulance her eyes ranged outward. She spotted us watching her, I was sure of it, and I felt her suspicion grow. Our faces must have been a sight. The paramedics closed the door, cutting off our view, and we watched with intensifying emotions as Edward climbed into the ambulance too.

"We should go," Emmett muttered.

His muttering barely registered in my furious mind. What had Edward just done?

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	5. Chapter 5

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_**Chapter 5  
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"Let's go over our options," Carlisle sighed.

This was the second time we convened at the dining room table on account of Edward. This time was different though. Now he sat with us. Now we were discussing how to deal with his stupidity rather than his sensibility.

"We could leave," Esme suggested.

"That's an option," Carlisle agreed.

"A bad option," I disagreed. "If we leave now, we'll be leaving behind more than just rumors this time. She knows we're different. She's witnessed it for herself. If we leave she has no reason to stay silent."

"So what, your suggesting intimidation tactics?" asked Emmett.

"I'm merely suggesting that running is a bad option… Although intimidation tactics is another option."

"I think, under the circumstances, making the girl live in fear would be unhelpful and overly cruel. Over kill." Carlisle interrupted our speculating. He didn't deny it was an option, it was just an option he disapproved of.

Something he said stuck in my head though. The phrase "over kill".

The law had been broken. Edward had exposed us. Blatantly. Granted it could have been worse, the whole of the crowd could have seen us instead of just the one… But there was only one witness… If the Volturi knew they'd silence her themselves without hesitation…

I didn't look at Edward but I knew he was glaring at me from across the table. He was listening to everyone's thoughts, and he knew exactly where mine were leading. I could feel his anger, his hatred, growing in his chest as he listened to my contemplations. I knew the only reason he stayed silent was because I hadn't made any decisions yet.

Over kill, Carlisle had said. Yes, if Bella Swan were killed that would certainly solve our problem. We could do it very easily, our kind never left any DNA. A perk of being impermeable and perfect. Humans disappeared all the time. One unexplained disappearance would not send any fingers pointing at us…

But who would do it if I suggested this thing? Certainly not Carlisle or Esme, and Edward was too close already. Besides if he was the one to do the deed he would torment himself for it for the rest of his existence… I couldn't bear that. Alice? No, I won't cause strife between her and Edward. Rosalie had the control necessary and was indifferent to the suffering of humans. Emmett could do the job with ease if he thought it was necessary and he'd never look back. I could do it too. I had more than enough experience, and would it really be fair to put this on someone else if it was to be my idea?

I could see it now. Bella couldn't see my scars, she thought I was beautiful. It would be easy enough to turn on the charm and lure her away… Or why wait for her to agree? Slip silently in to her room while she slumbered unaware… I could crush her while she slept, never giving her the chance to wake and defend herself… Its not like self defense would do her any good, and waking her would only make her suffer needlessly… I'd take her body away, her father couldn't declare her death suspicious if there was no body to prove a crime had taken place. I'd just dump her in the mountains, let the scavengers-

I didn't finish that thought as a furious snarl ripped from Edward's chest. He knew I had decided.

"No!" Alice shouted. We both ignored her and got to our feet.

_It's a good way Edward,_ I thought.

"It's not," Edward growled.

I was aware of the confusion and stress in the room. Five sets of eyes watched with anxiety as they watched Edward and I stare each other down. One pair of stunning topaz eyes was not confused. Of course Alice would have seen what I was going to do when I decided to do it. Of course she could also see Edward planning to stop me. As could I.

Here was the thing though. Edward's ability would almost always give him an advantage in a fight. Except for a fight against me. When it came to a real battle, not on a chessboard, strategy was my friend. Strategy had become instinctual and I could fight on instinct… By the time Edward heard a move in my head I would already be making it. We were evenly matched in a fight.

_And you know it too, don't you?_ I silently asked.

"No!" Alice was louder this time but remained ignored.

Edward didn't answer this time; he sank into a crouch.

I shifted my weight in anticipation. I wouldn't kill him, he was my brother and I loved him, of course I wouldn't kill him. I'd just have to injure him enough that he couldn't stop me. Injuries on our kind were almost always reparable. Break him now and fix him later. He'd never forgive me but I could deal with that so long as he was safe. As long as Alice was safe.

"Don't make Alice your excuse," he hissed, leaving his lip curled to expose his teeth.

"Then tell me Edward, what's _your_ excuse? How do you justify what you are doing? Endangering us all for a human you don't know, who'll die eventually anyway?" I retorted harshly, but I did want to hear the answer. Even as my lips curled back too, I knew I _needed_ an answer.

It didn't take long for the others to flip to the page that Edward, Alice and I were already reading. Four gasps and then everyone was speaking at once.

"There must be another way," Esme said with compassion, but could we really afford her compassion now?

"Jasper, we are not murders. Running is a better option than murder," said Carlisle. I could feel his patience and understanding, but also his anxiety.

"It's smart, easily doable, too," Emmett's response took my by surprise. I could feel it in his emotions, he agreed with me.

"If either of you lay a hand on her, I swear to God it'll be the last thing either of you do!" Edward growled. Anger. Desperation. Fear.

"No, Jasper, no you can't!" Alice said with desperation.

Which reminded me…

"You knew this would happen didn't you? You weren't the least bit surprised when Edward intervened, you knew! How could you not say anything?" I yelled at her.

I never yelled at Alice before now. I was never angry with her before now.

"I most certainly did not!" Alice yelled back. Indignantly. "Edward tell them! Tell them why I wasn't surprised! You know! I let you see it in my head not five minutes ago, and you know its true! You know it!" She was yelling at him now. Frustrated.

Edward said nothing. He wouldn't take his eyes off me long enough to glare at her the way I could tell he wanted to.

"Fine I'll say it! The vision I kept from you the other night was not of the car accident because Tyler hadn't decided to speed to school then, it was Edward falling in love with Bella!"

Everyone was silent then. Everyone looked to Edward for confirmation but he didn't give it. He just ground his teeth together.

I could feel it. His insane need to protect her at all costs and the possessive edge to his emotions when Alice said _her_ name. His anger and hatred toward me when I planned how to kill her. His sudden fascination with her. His fear when Emmett agreed with me. I assumed that fear was because he was outnumbered, but I could see now he feared not for himself…

"I won't pursue the feeling. I'll stay away from her," Edward spoke slowly through his teeth. I could feel his pain in that statement.

My fury was gone, replaced by pity. Could I do it? Take away his Alice? If I ever lost my Alice I would lose me. Destroying Bella might destroy Edward. I couldn't destroy her. I couldn't destroy him.

Edward relaxed and straightened out of his crouch, but only a little. His weight shifted toward Emmett and I guessed that Emmett had not let go of the idea.

"There," Alice said looking at me very pleased. Then anger entered her being as she looked at Edward. "Edward-" She began.

"No!" He yelled at her. Emmett was now forgotten.

The table was separating Alice and Edward but I needed a bigger obstacle between his rage and her petite form. I stepped in front of her and tensed back into my fighting stance.

"You changed it Edward, not me. By saving her today you changed that fact and her path. You can't just stay away from her it will hurt you, besides, she loves you now too!"

"Wait Alice," I interrupted whatever Edward was about to say. "What changed?"

"When I said he would either kill her or he wouldn't… _That_ changed… He will either kill her or _turn_ her."

"I'll do neither!" Edward yelled again. "I'll stay away. She deserves better than this life, she deserves to get married, have a family, a career… I won't sentence her to this!"

Carlisle flinched. I felt his guilt. Four out of seven were his creations. Edward felt it too.

"I didn't mean it like that Carlisle. I never regretted you saving me, but she has other options, options I didn't, and it would be wrong to take them from her," Edward voice was softer now.

Rosalie who had been silent through all of this finally spoke. "I agree… with Edward. Changing her shouldn't be viewed as an option. Our options should be do we let her live, risk exposure, or do we end this before it's to late? I say end it. End her. While there's still time"

"No Rose. I. Won't. Let. You." Edward said each word deliberately, his voice a deadly whisper.

"There's no risk of exposure. Bella will be true to her word to Edward. She loves him to much to betray him." Alice assured us.

"Rose, we are not going to start taking lives to benefit ourselves now. You five will go back to school. Act as normal as possible. Jasper's right, leaving might lessen her incentive to stay silent." His eyes flicked to Edward. "Edward, I would never ask you to stay away from her if you really feel that strongly about her, but please keep in mind that you will not be the only one implicated if this ends badly. Just be careful."

"I'll stay away from her. You say she loves me Alice? She won't continue to much longer. The beautiful thing about humans is that they always change."

Again I felt a twinge of pain at the coming separation but now I felt his resolve too. He would do this. I could feel Alice's disapproval at his plan, but she felt certain too. Certain of what? His success or his failure? Esme was happy and upset at the same time. I knew the reason for that. She was afraid Edward would never find his match and now he had… Unfortunately now that he found her he was forcing himself to let her go…

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	6. Chapter 6

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_**Chapter 6  
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The following month was strange. Even by our standards. We were abnormally normal, dedicated to keeping our façade as perfect as our faces.

Even with Alice's assurances, Emmett, Rosalie and I were not convinced that the girl could keep her mouth shut. At Emmett's request, Rosalie followed Bella to the ladies' room the day after the accident and hid in a stall to hear what Bella would say to her friends, away from her male admirers. I was shocked at Rosalie, I just couldn't imagine her displaying such un-Rosalie behavior even for Emmett. Edward was pissed when he found out and the expression on his face was such that she didn't dare commit to anymore reconnaissance missions.

I was sure Edward was monitoring the situation himself regardless. Listening to the minds of others as she recounted her tale of near death and Edward's heroic save. If he heard anything troubling in their minds he would have mentioned it. Even so, I kept track of her emotions whenever I was in range, and that wasn't often. She and I shared no classes and we always seemed to be at opposite ends of the campus. I didn't want to go out of my way, it would be too obvious what I was doing and it would be sure to set off Edward's short temper. The only time I could inconspicuously spy was lunch hour and my concentration was hindered by Edward hissing profanities at me as he listened to my thoughts.

For the most part, that week, Bella seemed mostly annoyed when the others asked her questions. When she got to the part about owing her life to Edward, her annoyance faded to a mixture of appreciation and confusion. I was a little surprised that she never embellished the story as most humans would have done. Eventually that week passed and the students lost interest and her emotions changed. Fascination. Frustration. Longing. Disappointment. A strange sense of aloneness.

Bella was not the only person I was keeping an eye on. Edward too had become a priority. He had always had a hot temper, but in the days following the accident the slightest thing would set him off. I felt what he was feeling. He was longing too. There were other emotions as well. Irritation. Jealousy. Determination. Sadness. Fear. Disgust.

It was strange. As long as I've known him, I've never known him to be unhappy, not like this. Edward's emotional state usually seemed to flow smoothly, a mixture of contentment, indulgence, and when occasion warranted it, boredom. His emotions had changed radically, he flickered from negative emotion to negative emotion so quickly I found myself obsessively trying to guess the thought behind each one. He was miserable. He could lie to the others but not to me. He knew I knew he was miserable. I did try to help but I couldn't really understand it.

The love part I understood just fine. Emotions. They're what I do. But loving Bella after having one conversation with the girl made no sense. Even if it made sense how could he have fallen so far and fast into love that he couldn't make himself let her go? I guess she was kind of pretty, she was no Alice, but she did have a funny way of using her big brown eyes to express her emotions. I suppose the way her face lit up with scarlet from time to time would be considered pretty too, but I couldn't appreciate it. All I could think when she did that was how much she looked like dinner… But it would be naïve to think Edward was only interested in her looks. He wasn't shallow that way. What had she said to him, that day, to make _him_ infatuated with _her_?

Eventually I stopped paying attention to Bella, she was flawlessly minding her mouth. I never stopped watching Edward and I wasn't the only one feeling the strain. Carlisle's concern for Edward grew day by day. Esme's worry pretty much exploded out of her the day Edward stopped playing the piano. Alice's disapproval as she watched him alter his future rolled off in waves. Emmett hunted with Rosalie. Rosalie avoided Edward as much as was possible and with good cause. She thought his infatuation was unreasonable. I guessed from the look on Edward's face and Rosalie's snide comments that her thoughts about the girl were not at all pleasant.

Alice and I barely had any alone time anymore. It felt like keeping the peace at home had become a twenty four hour occupation. When Edward got over this I was going to take advantage of it. Screw chess, Edward's newfound martyrdom, and the emotional neediness of my family. I _wanted_my Alice.

"Mr. Hale?"

"Pssts… He's talking to you, sketch." Rosalie whispered to low for the teacher to hear.

"What question was it?" I whispered back through unmoving lips.

"An easy one for _you…_What year did the Confederate States secede?"

I nearly laughed. Yes, I knew that one.

"Eighteen sixty one." I answered.

"Very good, now…" He continued on with his lecture.

My last class of the day. American History. My easiest class by far because I _was_American history.

Rosalie and I met Alice and Emmett by the cafeteria after class and I couldn't help noticing Alice felt particularly smug. I observed the pleased smile and noted her eyes sliding in and out of awareness.

"Okay Alice," I gave her a playful nudge in the ribs. "Spill it."

Before she could respond Rosalie blurted out, "What is that jerk doing? As if she isn't already suspicious enough! Why is he making another spectacle?" Outrage again.

We all followed the direction of her glare to see what Edward had done now to upset her. Instead of waiting in the parking space like a normal person, he had pulled out of his space and was now idling in front of Bella. A line was forming to as he held up traffic.

"He's waiting for Tyler to ask Bella to the dance, which reminds me… Jasper, would you go to the spring dance with me?" Alice comically fluttered her dark eyelashes at me.

Personally I wasn't crazy about the idea of spending more time with the humans but Alice loved the chance to dress up. How could I deny her something she loves?

"You know I'll go anywhere with you," I said softly admiring her answering grin.

We could see Tyler climbing out of his still running car, and walking over to Bella. We were close enough now that if I concentrated hard enough I could feel her. So out of curiosity I concentrated. Frustration. Irritation. I was close enough to feel Edward too. Frustration. Jealousy.

Emmett chuckled. "He really has lost his mind, hasn't he?"

Rosalie growled a low sound no human would hear.

_Relax._I sent the emotion toward Rosalie. Whatever Edward was up to, two vampires fighting in the school parking lot would be one sight we could not explain away.

When we got to the car Edward was amused. I didn't need my ability to feel that emotion though. We all could feel it. His body shook with laughter, and the laughter sounded the way it had that once before… It sounded consuming. It was contagious too. Emmett had no more idea than the rest of us as to what was going on but he chuckled quietly as he held the door open for Alice and Rosalie.

I sat up front with Edward tasting his emotional state. He was trying to calm himself. Normally I would have sped the process along but I was glad he was laughing again. In back Rosalie muttered a few words with a profanity interlocked in the middle. Edward must have heard more in her thoughts because he got annoyed with surprising swiftness.

"Jasper? I'm taking a hunting trip when we get home, did you want to join me?" Edward asked. "I don't plan on going far, the best we'll find is elk but…"

"Yes. I should hunt." I thought about how I felt this afternoon, staring at the unprotected back of the boy who sat in front of me in American History. The venom had mass-produced in my mouth, making it hard to swallow. I'm just happy I didn't start drooling. Yes, now is the perfect time to hunt.

"I thought as much," replied Edward and for once he didn't sound patronizing.

"Yeah, I know better now." He smirked at me.

_I would hope so,_I thought in response.

j*J*j

The buck would be my second kill tonight. He was old, I could see that from the many pointed crown he wore. It was almost a shame to kill him. Almost. I launched myself at him, as he ran uselessly away. I landed on his shoulders, grabbed the antlers and twisted. There was a crack as his neck broke and he went down with a thud.

Edward laughed from behind me. "Nice, Jazz, but is it really necessary to ride your food before you eat it?"

"Necessary?" I asked with a grin.

Edward was in a better mood tonight than he had been since he came back from Alaska. Something intangible had changed, and as I fed I tried to pinpoint what it was exactly. As before I could feel the determination, fear and disgust. No, not disgust… self-loathing. He was disgusted with himself. The longing he felt was still there, but now accompanying it was hope. There was something else though… not quite an emotion but something close enough to register with my ability… Restlessness. Restlessness that seemed to be intensifying with every passing second. The hope and the restlessness were both new, but what was he hoping for and why would it make him restless?

"Jasper? Do you mind heading home by yourself?" Edward interrupted my speculating. From the question alone I thought he might want some time to be without my thoughts in his head but again something new ran through him. Excitement.

"What are you up to?" I avoided his question with one of my own.

I felt a flicker of irritation mingling with uncertainty and then he said, "Look, there is something I have to do okay? I'll be back in time to drive to school, you won't be late… I promise." Edward's attempt at humor only made me more suspicious, but before I could press the issue, he was running.

When it ran dry, I left the carcass where it lay and ran too. But unlike Edward, I was running home. Home to Alice. Maybe, if there was time she could see what madness Edward was up to now. I leapt the river easily and as I broke through the trees I could see Alice, waiting for me in the doorway, and her beautiful porcelain face alight with a smile meant for me.

"So, what's he up to?" I tried to sound casual.

Alice just winked.

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